Filed by: Agent Bella, Senior Household Operative (SHO)
Status: Complicated.
It began three days ago. The humans brought home… a creature.
They called it Bruno.
Small. Floppy. Smelling suspiciously of milk, mystery, and chaos.
They said, “He’s your baby brother!”
I said nothing. But my tail flicked in Morse code for, “Define brother.”
Phase 1: Initial Assessment & Hostile Takeover
At first, I assumed he was a temporary intern — a short-term recruit in need of training. Perhaps he’d be assigned to Sock Retrieval or Biscuit Surveillance.
But no.
He stayed.
He moved in.
He touched my things.
My blanket. My chew bone. My squeaky duck, which now squeaks… differently.
Phase 2: Formal Complaints & Lack of Action
The humans keep saying things like,
“Bella, be gentle!”
“Bella, share with Bruno!”
“Bella, don’t growl!”
To which I politely respond:
“Bella is already showing remarkable restraint for someone whose duck has been slobbered on by an unlicensed rookie.”
Bruno follows me everywhere. He copies my walk. He eats from my bowl (the audacity). And when I try to nap, he sits on my ear like it’s a designated playground.
I’ve filed multiple complaints with Management. Claire just scratches my head and says, “You’ll love him soon.”
Love? We’re not there yet. We’re barely at “tolerate.”
Phase 3: The Turning Point
But last night… something odd happened.
The thunder growled outside — the sky’s version of a tummy rumble. Bruno whimpered. Tiny. Trembly.
And without thinking, I nudged closer, curling around him.
He stopped shaking.
He sighed — that funny little puppy sigh, all trust and warmth.
And for the first time… I didn’t mind.
Mission Parameters: Updated
This morning, he brought me my squeaky duck. Covered in drool, yes. But also… in effort.
Maybe he’s not here to replace me. Maybe he’s here to remind me what it’s like to begin again — to see the world as full of socks to steal, puddles to splash, and possibilities to chase.
So I’ve updated my mission log:
- Primary Objective: Monitor Bruno for continued behavioural progress.
- Secondary Objective: Teach him the ancient art of Treat Negotiation.
- Emotional Note: Jealousy and company are at war… but I think the company is winning.
End of Report.
Filed under: Operation Brother Watch — Status: Ongoing. 🐾
How did your furry agent handle a new “recruit”? Share your own intelligence reports in the comments below!
