When you aimlessly travel through life, it’s easy to lose sight of what’s important, days blur into weeks and before you know it, another Christmas has come and gone with nothing to show but a series of distractions and habits that are designed to fill in time. This is where Ben found himself, I didn’t mean that literally, but it was the beginning of his journey of discovery. Please enjoy Ben’s story.
Ben’s story.
Ben had always been the type to drift through his days, letting time slip away as he scrolled through his phone, watched TV, or let his mind wander. But lately, an uncomfortable feeling had settled in—a nagging sense that something was missing, something he couldn’t quite put his finger on. It wasn’t that Ben was unhappy; he just felt… aimless.
One evening, as he mindlessly scrolled through social media, a simple message popped up on his screen: “What am I looking for?” The question jolted him out of his digital trance. He stared at the words for a long moment, feeling the weight of them settle in his chest. What was he looking for? Ben realised he didn’t have a clue.
Over the next few days, that question haunted him. He couldn’t shake it, even as he tried to ignore it by diving back into his usual distractions. But the more he tried to push it away, the more it lingered. Finally, he decided he needed to figure it out.
But how?
One afternoon, a few days later, while taking a walk to clear his mind, an idea struck him. Instead of trying to figure out what he wanted, which seemed impossible, maybe he could start by identifying what he didn’t want. It was a simpler task and one he could approach with clarity. After all, he had seen enough to realise what he didn’t want in his life.
Ben began by listing the things that made him feel restless or dissatisfied. He didn’t want to spend his evenings glued to his phone, watching other people live their lives. He didn’t want to waste his weekends binge-watching TV shows that left him feeling empty. He didn’t want to keep avoiding the uneasy feeling that he was meant for something more.
As he walked, Ben mentally crossed out the things he didn’t need. He didn’t need the constant comparison that came from social media. He didn’t need the numbing distraction of endless entertainment. He didn’t need to keep filling his time with activities that left him feeling hollow.
With each “no,” Ben felt a little lighter, as if he were shedding layers of a heavy coat. By the time he returned home, he had a clearer sense of what he wasn’t looking for. But that still left the question: what was he looking for?
Over the next few weeks, Ben focused on eliminating the things he didn’t need. He cut back on social media, limited his TV time, and spent less time scrolling aimlessly online. In the space he created, he started experimenting with activities that he hadn’t tried in a while. He picked up an old sketchbook, went on long walks in nature, and even tried cooking new recipes.
At first, it felt strange, like he was just filling the time with new distractions. But slowly, something shifted. He found that sketching brought him a sense of peace and satisfaction he hadn’t felt in a long time. His walks became moments of clarity and reflection. Cooking became a creative outlet that filled him with a quiet joy.
Ben realised that what he had been looking for wasn’t something he could find through distraction or entertainment. It was a sense of purpose, a connection to activities that made him feel alive and fulfilled. By identifying what he didn’t want, he had uncovered what he truly needed: time to create, to reflect, and to nourish both his body and mind.
The question that had once haunted him now felt like a friend, guiding him toward a life that felt richer and more meaningful. Ben knew he wasn’t done searching—life would always have more questions than answers—but he was finally on a path that felt right. And for now, that was enough.
P.S. Nobody else can tell you what you want, but they can show you what you don’t want in your life.
